the beginning

if i could start from the beginning

i would go back to seeing your face light up

when i got into your beat up jeep.

i would hold those butterflies inside for forever.

i would cherish the nervous look before we kiss

i would expand the love we showed.

i would beg you to never let go of my hand

i would make you promise we’d be together

forever.

but even if i went back to the beginning,

it still wouldnt change how we are now.

worn, scared, falling apart

slowly but surely. 

the tears that fall every night is proof

that we will never be how we were

in the beginning

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i lay in my bed,

wishing the thoughts would leave my head.

im tired of dreamin,

of thinking about what could be.

im sick of empty promises,

of painting perfect pictures.

i want to know whats really in front of us,

i dont want to have to read between the lines.

i want something to fill

the emptiness that has taken over.

and i want it to happen soon.

please.