i lay in my bed,

wishing the thoughts would leave my head.

im tired of dreamin,

of thinking about what could be.

im sick of empty promises,

of painting perfect pictures.

i want to know whats really in front of us,

i dont want to have to read between the lines.

i want something to fill

the emptiness that has taken over.

and i want it to happen soon.

please.

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What are you trying to do?

you dont respond to my messages

but yet your not too busy to find yourself on twitter..

i would call you

but i already know you wont answer,

you say you love me, that you cant love another

but everything is contridicting.

i dont think you understand just how bad you hurt me

the last week i was there.

all i wanted to do was spend the last week with the guy i love,

but you acted like you wanted nothing to do with me.

i was breaking, 

i couldnt keep it together,

and you disappeared.

i needed you,

but you ran.

and now youre doing it all over again.

so what do you want?

to push me away,

to break me into tiny pieces

that can never get put back together?

becuase thats whats happening,

and im left here trying so hard,

to get you to stay.

but i cant get you to stay 

if you want to leave.

just stop playing these games.

im already broken,

in pieces,

you win.

so go if thats what you want.

if youre happy then ill learn to deal.

they all leave.

I really just dont know what to think anymore. i forgot who i used to be. i cant seem to remeber how we were..just what we are now. and i keep thinking “it will get better” “things will fall into place” but im not so sure anymore. you were my everything and i know distance is just so impossible to be in a serious relationship but i dont know..i feel empty without you. my world revolved around you as sad as that is. and im not sure if this pain is from not being together every day like we were for 2 months or if its the face that we arent even a couple anymore. we are just young people completly in love with each other but to afraid to make something out of it. i guess im just really confused of this entire situation. im sorry if i bothered you too much. im sorry.

Thinking.

why is he taking forever to text you back?

hes prolly drinking, actually hes prolly halfway to drunk.

i mean i shouldnt have said not to drink to much.

of course hes going to, hes at a party with his friends who party.

i cant get mad cuz then he will keep doing it, i mean thats how it works right.

ugh too late im already mad. 

he can get shitty with me for smoking weed one time and i was with him..

and he goes and drinks without me all the time.

we had an agreement that hed only drink with me..

guess i was stupid to think it would actually go like that..

i dont like his friends becuase of that…

and i mean if hes with me..and im drinking too like its ok.

as fucked up as that sounds.

but at least then i know what hes doing.

hes not flirting with other girls..or doing something really stupid.

like he used to always do when he drank.

like i just dont know.

and it sucks cuz i have NO ONE to distract my mind.

talk me through it.

becuase my dumbass moved.

and now i have no friends. no one.

im alone, on a friday night after work

while the one person i have

my boyfriend

is off at a football party

prolly getting wasted even though he knows ill be so pissed

and with all his friends.

ignoring me.

life is just so grand.

like part of me wants to express all of this to him

but then the other part doesnt.

like what if what im thinking is actually true?

yea i dont want to face that.

i ran from all my problems in indiana 

to create even more bigger ones here.

can i just get something to turn my mind off

even for a few hours…please?

The Five Types Of *N Sync Songs There Are

Thought Catalog

There are fifth graders who have not been alive since the boy band’s retirement. There are people who don’t know we once valued Justin’s back up dancers just as much as we valued him. As such, it is only right that we, the privileged millennials who begged our parents into chaperoning us to the No Strings Attached tour, introduce our boys to a new generation.

While we were busy loading our five-disc boom boxes with all matters of boy band and girl power jams, we probably didn’t notice certain lyrical themes all that quickly. Never fear, however: to prepare us for what could only be the greatest reunion of. all. time we can now call upon the power of our college degrees. (Hey, that crippling debt’s gotta be good for something.)

As such, whether you need to explain to your tween cousin why this potential assemblage is so important to…

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50 Questions To Ask Your Crush To See If They’re Right For You

Thought Catalog

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3. What happened the last time you cried?

4. What happened the time in your life when you were the most nervous to do something?

5. What would your…

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